Today I wanted to research some of the characteristics of a cyber bully, in order to try and explain why I had labelled “our friend” as a cyber bully.
Most of the online articles I had found were aimed mainly at teenagers and parents of teenagers, in order to help families understand what cyber bullying is and how to prevent it. It would appear from what I researched that cyber bullying is happening more commonly amongst the young people; the case of my Flickr friend and his story of victimization appears to be only a very rare case of cyber bullying amongst adults. However, I feel that the same tactics that cyber bullies use, no matter what the age group, are the same.
First of all, I would like to provide the definition of what cyber bullying is, taken from the Australian “Bullying no way” website:
“Bullying is usually defined as any offensive or aggressive behaviour directed at another person, repeated over time. It may be physical, emotional or social.
Cyber bullying, as it has become known, includes text or images posted on personal websites or transmitted via email or cell phones....
...Sometimes cyber bullying happens as a result of a relationship break up. It can also be based on fear or prejudice. And sometimes, some young people just think it is a “fun game”.
What are some of the motivations behind cyber bullying?
Cyber bullies
“are often motivated by anger, revenge or frustration. Sometimes they do it for entertainment or because they are bored and have too much time on their hands and too many tech toys available to them. Many do it for laughs or to get a reaction. Some do it by accident, and either send a message to the wrong recipient or didn't think before they did something.”
(taken from www.stopcyberbullying.org)
How is cyber bullying different from face-to-face or playground bullying?
“Because their motives differ, the solutions and responses to each type of cyberbullying incident has to differ too. Unfortunately, there is no "one size fits all" when cyberbullying is concerned. Only two of the types of cyberbullies have something in common with the traditional schoolyard bully. Experts who understand schoolyard bullying often misunderstand cyberbullying, thinking it is just another method of bullying. But the motives and the nature of cybercommunications, as well as the demographic and profile of a cyberbully differ from their offline counterpart.”
(taken from www.stopcyberbullying.org)
The “Bullying No Way” website also verifies this, in that it explains that some of the cyber bullies are victims themselves of playground bullying; they use cyber bullying as a means of retalliation to what they have experienced.
The “Stop Cyber Bullying” website categorizes individual cyber bullies into four “types”: The “Vengeful Angel”, the “Power Hungry” (or “Revenge of the Nerds”), the “Mean Girls, and the “Inadvertent Cyber Bully” (or “Because I can”)
*The Vengeful Angel: Does not see himself/herself as a bully. Rather, they see themselves trying to right a wrong. Often will Vengeful Angel cases occur when one of the cyber bully's friends are being victimized by another cyber bully, and they write hateful things back about the other cyber bully, justifying to himself/herself that the other cyber bully “deserves” it.
*The Power Hungry (or “Revenge of the Nerds”): These are usually victims of playground bullying themselves, often females (or males who are not physically intimidating in build),who are not considered by their peers as “cool” or “popular”. They use cyber bullying as a means to try and embarrass or frighten their bigger, more socially acceptable peers.
*The Mean Girls: As the title suggests, almost all of the kinds of cyber bullies who fit into this category are female. They are classified as “the most immature of all cyberbullying types” (taken from www.stopcyberbullying.org) They write mean stuff about other girls (and sometimes boys) in order to attract more attention to themselves and to uphold their so-called “self-esteem”. Usually, this type of cyber bullying dies when enough people choose to ignore their antics. They only keep writing if they keep getting the publicity.
*The Inadvertant Cyber Bully (or “Because I can”): These types of bullies, unlike the Power Hungry or “Revenge of the Nerds” kind, often write stuff to people without taking time to think about what they are writing first, or without reflecting on the possible consequences of their actions. They often abuse people in this manner in response to something they don't agree with online, or from an email or other form of communication sent to them.
I would also like to add from my friend's experience that sometimes the cyber bully will use reverse psychology on the victims to show that the nasty things written have been true, and that the bully is only pointing this out for the victim's own good. Our perpetrator and his accomplice, when they first attacked my friend's religion, pointed out to him his lack of ability to communicate effectively in English ,so as to be able to back up his reasons fairly why he was a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. He was accused of getting the missionaries to write the answers to the questions they proposed to him, when the fact was he copied and pasted his answers from the official church website (www.lds.org) whenever he found it hard to express adequately his thoughts and feelings. They in turn used this in effect to communicate to my friend: “You see? You cannot tell me yourself why what you believe is true, and if you can't personally back up your claims, how can your church be true? It can't be, if you are unable to express yourself”.....
And in the case of JJ's threats to sue me for defamation: From my readings from this morning, it would seem that JJ, by his threat to sue me, is trying to paint me as the “vengeful angel”, because I am getting involved and writing “nasty” comments about him to ruin his reputation, because of what he had done to my friend. The reality is that what I had written was simply the truth, and that he himself is the “vengeful angel” by trying to justify his actions and defending himself against an “injustice”.
It is unfortunately sad to say that my friend who was victimized ended up becoming an “inadvertant cyber bully” towards the end, according to the definition given above. However, the perpetrator who drove him to this point had become a cyber bully long before my friend eventually stooped down to this level. In the course of approximately 8 months, my friend had to endure endless taunts and abuse from JJ, categorizing his actions (according to the “Bullying No Way” website) as an act of cyber bullying. His original motivations for bullying my friend was to “prove” to him that he was in the wrong religion, and made fun of his new found belief. When he got tired of that, he decided to make fun of his English and even his sexuality, just to get a reaction from my friend. This behaviour matches the description of the different motivations mentioned in the “Stop Cyber Bullying” website. And eventually, JJ. became a “Vengeful Angel”, in that he posted Bob's not-so nice retaliation in an attempt to make himself look like he was the “victim”, and that by posting this email was trying to correct the “injustice” that had befallen him. This, as well as many other evidences back up my theory that JJ. can be categorized as a cyber bully.
References:
http://www.bullyingnoway.com.au/
http://bullyingnoway.com.au/talkout/spotlight/cyberBullyingIs.shtml
http://bullyingnoway.com.au/talkout/spotlight/cyberBullyingTechnology.shtml
http://bullyingnoway.com.au/talkout/spotlight/cyberBullyingConsequences.shtml
http://bullyingnoway.com.au/talkout/spotlight/cyberBullyingPrevention.shtml
http://www.stopcyberbullying.org/
http://www.stopcyberbullying.org/parents/howdoyouhandleacyberbully.html
Other useful articles to help you understand cyber bullying:
http://www.smh.com.au/news/technology/cyber-intimidation-and-the-art-of-bullying/2007/11/18/1195321595404.html
http://www.cybersmartkids.com.au/cyberbullying.htm
http://www.dosomething.org/tipsandtools/11-facts-about-cyber-bullying
http://www.zimbio.com/How+to+stop+cyberbullies/articles/7/The+Facts+on+Cyber+Bullying
http://sixtyminutes.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=444908
http://www.readersdigest.com.au/life/cyberbullies/article52026.html
http://eprints.qut.edu.au/1925/1/1925.pdf
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